thanks for the memories
by daughter-of-october
Summary: [Characters: Wendy Marvell, Cana Alberona, Laxus Dreyar, Romeo Conbolt] # Summary: A loved person always leaves a trace.
1. Chapter 1

**_thanks for the memories_**

**Characters**: Wendy Marvell, Cana Alberona, Laxus Dreyar, Romeo Conbolt

**Summary**: A loved person always leaves a trace.

* * *

Wendy Marvell, a sixteen year old mage of Fairy Tail, had enough

She had skipped from bar to bar for three days in a row now, searching for the criminal she had been hired to arrest. Yet bars still made her uncomfortable for multiple reasons. First of all, the patrons were usually rather drunk and while she should be used to this from the guildhall, her nakama made never the sort of comment she had had to endure the entire week. Secondly, she had not been able to bring Charle for the job which made her even jumpier. Thirdly, the outfits Mira-san had given her for the job were rather uncomfortable and far too revealing to the level that they made her feel cheap. And finally, bars reminded her of Cana, her nakama who had disappeared and this always hurt because she could use the older woman's expertise right now. Wendy had never felt as uncomfortable with Cana around because the card mage had been like an older sister.

But Cana had vanished without a trace three years ago, leaving behind nothing but questions and angry accusations between the others. Wendy remembered just too well how Gray had thrown Macao through a wall but this was because they all hurt and because they all missed their friend. Even Gajeel who had not been best friends with the brunette had voiced a certain discomfort at the lack of Cana in the guildhall.

But this was not the time for depressed thoughts because Wendy had a job to do. There were only a few bars left and as it had been said that the wanted criminal was a regular in one of the bars, he would be caught sooner or later. A little shaky on her heels, she walked down the road that led to a bar called Fortune's Fontaine. She blinked twice as she entered because the bar seemed to play around with the theme of magical card quite a bit. There were ancient cards one exposal just like copies of rare modern ones. It was like the entire bar had been designed to remind Wendy of Cana because there had been a time when she had sat at the table with the brunette, watching her how she dealt out cards too get insight into the future.

The young mage pushed her way through the crowd and sat down at the counter before she ordered a glass of orange juice and took the newest edition of the Weekly Sorcerer from her bag, skipping the page that still held the poster Reedus had designed right after Cana had gone missing. It was a bittersweet realisation that the older mage obviously was a master of hide and seek. She then proceeded to scan the area but once more, the criminal was not here yet.

"Aren't you a little too young to go out all alone?" the barmaid asked worried as she handed over the drink, true concern written into her eyes.

"I am sixteen," Wendy said, maybe a little bit too defiant because the lady frowned. "Are you the owner?" she added with an afterthought, maybe to apologise in advance for any damage she would cause once she would enter the fight.

"Wha- no, I am not. The owner is out tonight again, running some errands and dealing with unfinished business. It's such a shame that you missed her though. She has a soft spot for young travelling woman and likes to give advice," the woman shrugged.

Wendy nodded, utterly unimpressed before she scanned the crowd once more in hope to find her target, still without success. And so, after drinking her juice, she left the bar, musing about the fastest way to get to the next bar.

* * *

She was gone.

She had been away for a long time, for a long enough time that even the last trace of her scent had faded away and that the stain of her lipstick on the bathroom tiles was no longer visible – technically at least because he still saw the stain. The ruby red had painted his senses red, had set it afire. But this had been three years and a betrayal ago. When he heard Gray and Erza discuss whether they should go and look for her once more, he did never join the conversation even though it was long overdue that he commented for multiple reasons.

He had been the last one to see her, as much had he admitted already, and he was the current guild master in charge because his grandfather's health had suffered greatly under Gildarts' angry accusations and everyone's gossip about how Makarov should have seen this coming.

This was so unfair and he hated her for doing this to the guild, to his grandfather and himself. It was strange how unfamiliar she seemed now, three years after the day her apartment had been empty, three years after kisses under the starry sky, three years after laughter and dances.

The pain was bittersweet at best and he was ever so tired of the way the guild dealt – or rather not dealt with her absence. If he had to hear another song either Gajeel or Mira dedicated to the missing woman, he would scream and destroy the guildhall – and all the instruments. If Erza would ask him one more time whether he knew why she had done this to them all, he would find ways to get rid of the other S-class mage – maybe even permanently. Because this was the end.

He could not longer live in a dream where he watched how she took off her makeup after another long day. The reality was the one where he tore apart the books she had left behind and where he ripped photographs that showed her into tiny little pieces. He was angry at her because he had trusted her and she had betrayed this trust the very day she had vanished, leaving no trace the dragon slayers had been able to follow. He had no space in his place for her anymore, no reason why a woman who had sneaked away like a thief in the death of night should be still there.

He watched how Gray and Erza managed to get Natsu and Lucy involved once more – Juvia was always willed to look for her missing friend – just like Wendy who was on another solo job, once more without Charle but with the determinate look on her face that made it obvious that she was working for her own goals right now.

Sometimes, he wanted to tell them that there hope was pointless but when he saw Wendy and her determination to bring her home, no matter how much it would cost, or Juvia's gritted teeth whenever she talked Gajeel into joining them once more, he could not say it aloud. She had always been one to get what she wanted – because she had fought for it – but just too often, she had broken what she had gotten beforehand. She was bad news but this was nothing the others would want to hear even though getting away as fast as possible would be smart - otherwise, the pain would tear them to pieces – just like it had happened to him.

But when he was entirely honest, he was angrier at himself than at her. She had been a trickster from the start, a card mage and fortune-teller who had never been above playing against the rules when it had been necessary for her own interests. He had known this. He had known that it was dangerous to trust her, to let her get too close because she had always panicked when the distance had been too small because she had been scared of getting hurt once more.

Thus, he should have known better. When Erza had – unconsciously – implied that her departure might have been his fault, he had flinched back because this was true. He had made huge promises, promises he would have kept if she had let him but she had not.

And this left him with the question whether she had accepted his promise that he would always, always get her back home back then when they had been walking through the huge town after the king's banquet when he had carried Wendy while she had hummed a little song.

He had every intention to keep the promise – but to keep it, he had to find her first. "Don't get too arrogant, Fortune Teller," he muttered under his breath. "But I can and will find you … just watch me, yeah? You will be back where you belong soon enough … that's a promise."

* * *

"Wendy Marvell of Fairy Tail?" an unfamiliar voice asked as she stepped away from the bar.

She looked up, failing to be truly surprised as she looked straight at the criminal she had been looking for. This sort of job always had a good chance that the target would come to end the mage's search by attacking him or her. So she nodded slowly. "Yes?" she replied, excitement running through her veins as she slipped into a fighting stance. "What can I do for you?"

The fight started but the man was not exactly on the sky sorceress' level. After having casted support spells for far too many years, she had lately focused on her offensive moves, working on her secret goal. She ripped apart the man's defence like it had never existed in first place but then, right before she could finish the fight and arrest him, his hand lashed out and the force of her punch threw her backwards.

"Oi, oi."

The new voice was familiar without a doubt but for a moment, Wendy could not place it. The criminal was taken aback and this allowed the newcomer to place a punch. Then, as the woman straightened up a little, wild black hair concealed her face. She wore a blue shirt over a white top and simple brown pants. Like Wendy, she had chosen heeled shoes but happened to be better at walking and running in them as she easily kicked the man into the face, knocking him out.

As she swung her leg back into a normal stance, her t-shirt moved and revealed a black guild stamp on her stomach, marking her as a mage of Fairy Tail.

And then, Wendy understood.

This was Cana.


	2. Chapter 2

"Laxus?"

Evergreen stood in the doorway, her face holding the usual mixture of worry and annoyance she had not gotten rid of in the last few years. The female mage had taken Cana's disappearance not as good as most people would have guessed. While they had never been friends, they had had a certain kind of disbelieving respect for each other – something that had made them work together quite well in times of need.

"Evergreen," he said tiredly as he looked up from the book he had been reading.

She approached him slowly. "We … the Thundergod Tribe, we understand," she said. "We can relate to what you are going through right now. We are just asking you to join those who are still looking for her for a trip or two. The responsibility for the guild is heavy on your shoulders, yes, but … you deserve to ease your mind a little … maybe even find closure."

He sighed deeply. "Evergreen," he said. "Tell me, how am I supposed to find a woman who ran away from me … possibly out of fear to be called a traitor by her supposed friends?"

She shrugged. "I don't know," she said. "But … this does not sound like her at all."

He nodded. "Cana has many faces," he said slowly and sad yet stating a simple fact. "Her best days – judging for her magical abilities – are those when a snowstorm would seem warm compared to her … Erza knows a thing or two about picking only fights she can win … Mira knows about gaining strength from suppressed parts of her own personality … but Cana is the only one willed to sacrifice others to reach her goals."

"You have known this for a long time though, Laxus."

"And I thought that I could deal with it, yes," he admitted. "However, she won that gamble too. She always wins after all … even when I really, really tried to win…"

"I somehow have a hard time to follow you," Evergreen complained. "So, what did happen? Did she turn you down? Did she say that you were not her type or something like that?"

"Cana … she is, as she has proven many times, just as rational as some people here are emotional. She is a trickster, someone who always finds a way out of every mess … that explains why she has not left a message or something … she does not want to be found … at least not yet."

Evergreen frowned once more. "Self-imposed exile?" she asked slowly.

"Most likely, yes. We are alike in many aspects."

"In that case, I can understand why you rather don't go looking for her … there is something you did not mention, a secret you have kept all along … you know something no one else knows."

"Rather, I can imagine what might be her reason though I don't know for sure either … but … dealing with her for twelve years gave me a feeling for what she would do and what she would never even consider," he said. "Cana is a rational, nearly cold woman. But she isn't a bad one. She is a Fairy Tail mage and takes pride in it. If she disappeared, she is rather protecting someone else than herself … and I guess that she might be going through hell already – without us adding to her plight. We cannot pick all our fellow members battles, Ever."

"Did you consider … well, moving on?" she asked as she looked around in the messy room.

"You cannot move on from a vague dream," he replied. "Funnily, it never worked out properly for us … there was always something in our way … like, we had the option of doing something and then, something happened. Sometimes I feel like she cheated me by disappearing without a word but then I remember, she cheated herself just as much as me."

"It does sound rather strange … the idea that she might have been in love with you," Evergreen muttered, another frown appearing on her forehead.

"Well, that's rather insulting, don't you think so, Ever?"

She rolled her eyes. "For as long as I can remember sleepovers, Cana never voiced a statement that might have made it realistic for her to be a romantic – or even someone interested in love. She was rather saying that it was only a sham, something that always ended very painful," she said. "Mirajane, Erza – they are the true romantics. Juvia is solely focused on Fullbuster and Levy is too much of a realist to truly bother herself with thoughts about love."

"Not all of us can have a major crush on Elfman," he said, trying to ease the mood a little.

She glared at him from behind her glasses. "Well, if she was in love with you," she started, "then maybe she got afraid and left because of this. You are a lot like Gildarts after all … and Cana's mother died waiting for him to come home."

* * *

"Just … why?"

The question held so many different meanings that Cana was silent for a moment. It was not only an inquiry on her reasons for leaving. Wendy also demanded to know why she had been abandoned again by someone who had sworn to never abandon her. In a way, the card mage did feel guilty for telling no one that she was leaving, for claiming to leave for a job. She had planned this and for the first time in a very long time, her plan had not been disturbed.

For a very long moment, Cana was simply silent. She looked at the walls of the room like she saw them for the very first time before she sighed deeply. "The reason is connected to that job we screwed up ever so wonderfully," she said slowly. "Laxus and I, I mean. Technically, we succeeded, that's why you hear of this failure the first time. We solved the mystery, arrested the criminal and technically, there was nothing left for us to do – only did I complain that the reward was a little too low for our efforts. Laxus agreed. That was when it went downhill."

Wendy raised her eyebrow. "What did happen?" she asked softly.

"We decided to waste no money on the train and walk back instead – it was not that far and we were both completely uninjured. On our way, we passed a casino and he had the brilliant idea of gambling a little to increase our gain," she went on. "Here goes a piece of advice: Laxus sucks at poker. This is a card game. I use cards. It would have been my field of experience but no, he rather wanted to try it himself. And that was when everything went to hell. Laxus would not win at poker if it was the only way to save his life – and he is too proud to admit it." She snorted. "So if you ever need some jewels, challenge him. He sucks so badly that no one can lose to him."

"So, uh, he lost all the money you had gotten for the job?" Wendy asked.

"Exactly, yes," Cana confirmed, pouring tea into two cups. "So we were stuck away from the guild, without any money, tired and hungry … at midnight. And even Laxus was not crazy enough to suggest walking home at that time."

"But you had no money," the girl said with wide eyes. "So, what did you do?"

"I still had a little money – ten jewel or something like that. And unlike him, I have better nerves and can take risks a little better. So I played with the little money I still had and won enough cash for us to rent a room in an inn, get some food and a train ticket home."

The sky sorceress merely raised her eyebrows. She knew of Cana's gambling skill and when she said that she had started out with ten jewel, it was likely that she had won multiple thousand jewels. Card games came easy to her after all and she was more than calm enough to risk everything but the basics. Wendy had once seen how Cana had doubled a meek reward within three hours and to be honest, she had wondered whether the card mage had been cheating.

"I don't understand how this made you leave," Wendy admitted after a moment.

Cana sighed deeply, wrapping one strand of her black hair – obviously dyed in an attempt to be less likely to be recognised. "I majorly screwed up," she said, resting her chin on her palm. "I made a mistake I have sworn I would never make: I fell in love with the wrong person."

"There is a right and wrong in love? Are you serious?"

"If a relationship hurts, it is wrong. Love is not supposed to make you go sick with self-hatred and worry," the card mage said darkly. "I do remember how my mother faded away, slowly but steadily. It was like every day, another piece of her vanished. I hated to watch this … I hated how sorrow and sadness drained her until she finally died."

"And so you ran away because you are scared of ending the same way she ended?"

"Close enough," Cana said. "You have to know that once upon a time, I was a good friend of Laxus … but at some point, we started to drift apart. I hung out with Macao and Gray and he had his attitude change – and afterwards, I pretty much hated it to be in the same room as him because it was just painful to see what he became as time passed."

"So, uh, Laxus?"

The idea was rather strange as Wendy first considered it but then, it slowly started to make sense. Laxus and Cana were similar on terms of never sharing their ambitions openly. While Cana was one of the most popular members of the guild and while Laxus usually spoke about how much he wanted to be master one day, they never said what they truly thought about something. And the similarities did not end there. They were also the only ones but Master Makarov who could pull of the great spells of Fairy Tail.

"It was not my best decision but yes," Cana said. "That evening in the casino, after I won, we sat by the bar and had a few drinks. It was … nice, like in old times – before he started to think only about power. It was like meeting an old friend after a few years. Anyway, I am not the only one to make questionable decisions when drunk out of my mind."

Wendy wondered whether she really wanted to hear the entire story but she knew that there was no way of stopping Cana now because no matter how private the brunette was sometimes, she sometimes spilled out everything that burdened her to breathe easier again.

"I was … tired," the card mage mused. "Tired of being alone, tired of having no one who really listens to me when I have to rant about something … he listened. That was strange because, well, it was still Laxus and I didn't expect it from Sparky to stay and hear me rant."

She remembered just too well. Back in her childhood, back when they had been the only children in the guild, he had been her definition of home and that evening, it had felt like back then again. Maybe this had been the reason why she had not drunken as much as usual – maybe because she had wanted to remember everything without the alcohol sugar-coating everything. For a woman who permanently tried to outrun reality, she sometimes swore off alcohol at the strangest times. She had not wanted to be the resident drunk for once – or as he had called her after a few glasses of wine had been emptied – a whiskey princess. And even though she had not drunken much, at some point, her memory had simply surrendered her.

Cana and Laxus had been very much one and the same at this point, three years ago – they had both needed a friend, someone who would listen and who would not judge. She had always been good and reliable when it came to secrets so Laxus had – for this standards – opened up to her and ranted on and on for hours. They had talked about loneliness – too far away from home to care that usually, they did not speak much these days. They had talked about how frustrating it was to watch how everyone seemed to be dating someone else these days while they – the most seasoned members of their generation – still were alone.

She remembered that Laxus had smelled of a summer day at the beach that day and not like the usual mixture of thunderstorms and peppermint. She did not remember what music they had listened to as they had sat on the bed of the room her gambling skill had secured them. She also had no recollection of who had been the first to lean in for a kiss or who had first undone the other's top. She did not remember because it did not matter.

Wendy's face showed understanding as the young girl bit her lip. "So, uh, there were … consequences?" she asked, obviously rather uncomfortable with the topic.

"Yes," Cana nodded. "I screwed up – majorly. I was careless … for the first time in my life and of course, fate was there to punish me for that little mistake I made."

Wendy was speechless for a moment. She sat there and stared at the cup of tea in front of her. She had heard rumours in the guildhall, speculations on why Cana had left without a single word, without leaving a letter. Someone – she did no longer remember who – had suggested that she might have gotten pregnant and flown the premises to avoid a confrontation with Gildarts. No one had really believed in this theory, however, because this would have been a very un-Cana-like thing to do – especially since she frequently stood up to Gildarts anyway.

"A pregnancy is hard to conceal," she said after a moment before she looked up.

"Yes," Cana nodded. "That's exactly right."


	3. Chapter 3

The nursery was held in soft shades of purple and blue, reminding Wendy of the sky on a summer night. The curtains had been pulled close and for some reason, there was no sound from the bar below. In the middle of the room, in a small bed and carefully tucked in slept a child. The only thing visible was a ridiculous amount of pink curls that were all over the pillow.

"Cornelia," Cana said in attempt to explain everything which was impossible because there were too many open questions. "You can tell me how ridiculous I am, just go ahead."

But Wendy had no accusations to utter. She had known Cana for a very long time and she had learned to listen to the softer, unspoken words of the ever so often bold and brash brunette. While it had been only a year they had worked together, living in different apartments of the same complex and walking home together, the sky sorceress knew things no one else knew and thus had a certain insider knowledge that sometimes surpassed even what Gray – Cana's oldest friend – knew about the card mage. Cana had been Wendy's sister, it was a bond even time and distance had failed to erase, a bond that still made Wendy want to grab Cana's hand and drag her back home and go back to a time when this had been possible.

She had nothing she had to forgive. She knew Cana's fear, unvoiced but ever-present all the time, and so she could not blame everything that had happened on the older mage. Cana had been dealt a bad hand a the very beginning and so many years had passed struggling and fighting to get at least a small chance to live a happier live. Cana was no one who gave up, she was someone who always returned after she had been already forgotten. Picking up the pieces was something she was just too used to and maybe, or so Wendy thought, she had grown tired of this.

"Cornelia … was your mother's name right?" she asked nonetheless even though she knew that this was a topic that had haunted Cana for a very long time, some sort of guilt she had never been able to shake of completely.

"Yes," Cana said as she approached the cradle and gently brushed her daughter's hair out of the girl's closed eyes. "It may be a little unfair to burden her with this name … but it is a nice name and … she does not have to know the story attached to it, you see? We all got our demons after all … and I don't want my demons to become hers as well."

She had grown up in the three years she had spent away from the guild, away from her home – not like she had ever had a chance to avoid this. Since the morning she had realised what had happened, she had been in her focused modus – in the same modus the others had once dubbed her S-class modus because up to that day, the exam had been the only event she had truly been working for quite hard as it had been her only true ambition. She had judged the situation quickly before she had turned away and left everything she had known and loved behind.

Opening a bar from the money she had left as this had been the only thing she could earn money with because this was the only thing she really knew about, she had let the space in between of her family and her new life grow – partly to stop hurting this badly. Changing name and hair colour had been other steps to avoid being recognised. She had not used much effort if she was completely honest but this had been part of it all. Hiding in plain sight was the right thing to do when an entire guild was looking for a missing member.

And as time had passed, the identity she had built for herself had become more and more a comfortable coat she pulled on to hide from something that would only hurt. She had often been a coward but this had not been cowardice – this had been a decision she had made to protect. She had had to protect herself from an ugly confrontation with Laxus and probably her father – and from a life of bitterness and pain. She had had to protect Makarov from getting the heart attack that would kill him after everything he had survived. It had not been an easy choice but she had had gotten herself to go through with it.

Wendy seemed to understand but this was no miracle. The young girl had seen her fair share of pain after all and she had made her way as well – just like she had been supposed to. In the end, only time had the power to show which effort had been wasted and what would gain them a better future, what would ease the burden on their shoulders a little.

"Did … did you miss the guild?" Wendy asked after a moment.

Cana nodded slowly. "It has been on my mind a lot," she said. "I didn't like the idea of leaving like a thief at night – but if I had said goodbye, I don't think that I would have really gone through with it. The guild and everything I learned there, it's a part of me, a part of who I am. Letting go is very hard after twelve, well, nineteen years. But … missing everyone – it's part of the price I have to pay for my decision to leave." She absentmindedly lifted her shirt and stared at the black sign that still burned on her skin. "I heard that … that a guild is more than we all think – it's also a collection of the thoughts of everyone who ever was part of it, who ever wore the sign. That's why sometimes, stamps fade out after a while," she mused aloud. "Or why it is possible to leave a guild to join another. In that case, the stamp can be removed, too. But … since the stamp is the embodiment of the very idea that makes the guild stand out, it sometimes doesn't fade."

"Because the guild itself still considers you a member of Fairy Tail?" Wendy asked.

"Probably, yes," Cana nodded. "And … until I am excommunicated, I will stay in the guild."

"But you aren't coming home yet?"

"I can't. I have left because I couldn't face them, because I couldn't do this to Makarov … I was old and mature enough to consider the consequences to having unprotected sex … and really, I made my bed and now I have to lie in it – that's something I can hardly add to the burden he already carries," Cana said. "If things were differently…"

"But what about Laxus-san … when he is the father, he cannot abandon you like this!"

"I cannot expect him to take responsibility for something I did to myself, you see?" Cana shook her head. "Also, he is important to the guild. The guild is his life, his dream. A story like this would ruin this dream forever – and I … I can't destroy another dream like that. Some burdens, you see, can be shared and some, well, some have to be carried in silence."

"He is just as responsible for Cornelia-chan as you are," Wendy whispered. "It takes two to make a child, I know that."

"Even if he knew, it would not change much and it would improve nothing at all. He is too much like Gildarts … always on the run and never settling down," she said as she brushed back a strand of her hair. "He wouldn't be a good father – and I can do this alone anyway. If things had been differently, I would have stayed. Hell, I miss everyone so much it hurts. But … I wouldn't be strong enough to look at him and speak with him like nothing ever happened. That's the thing."

"Because you loved him?"

Cana nodded. "Strictly hypothetically, if Cornelia had been Gray's child, I could have stayed. I would have dealt with Juvia and I would have been able to ensure everyone that this was not the proof that there ever was something between Gray and me. But … Laxus…" she groaned as she smiled sadly. "He always makes everything so complicated."

"So, uh, you don't want everyone to know that you are here?" Wendy asked. "But … I can come and visit you – not often but … at least every once in a while? I have missed you. A lot."

The card mage nodded as the black dye left her hair. "I missed you as well, Wendy," she said as she rested her forehead against the girl's. "I seriously, absolutely miss everyone. And yes, you can come and visit. But … don't tell them. It would only put me back at the spot I gave so much for to leave. I don't want to have to answer their questions."

* * *

Laxus awoke to the sound of footsteps on the stairs and rolled to the side before he checked to alarm clock – only to realise that he had overslept. This should not have bee a surprise because he had worked until late into the night for weeks now, keeping track of everything his grandfather had not been able to do lately. For a moment, however, he was disoriented before he slowly remembered how he had not gone home last night because it had been his duty to stay at Cana's abandoned place – just in case that she would come back.

Erza and Juvia had started this tradition shortly after Cana had first gone missing and they had realised that she had left a part of her things behind. To keep her from returning like a thief at night to get what she had forgotten, they had camped in the apartment for months before Makarov who had also been clinging to this thin thread of hope had suggested that every night, someone else could sleep in the abandoned apartment. And so, Fairy Tail had covered the rent for the first few months.

By now, only a few people still slept there – mostly people who had been close friends of Cana. Gray usually stayed there for a few nights before Erza took over. Juvia and Lisanna sometimes had sleepovers in the apartment, often with Lucy and Levy. Even Gajeel slept there for a few nights each month even though he would never admit it. There was no official schedule but once someone could no longer bear the feeling of Cana everywhere – and she was extremely present in her abandoned apartment – they nodded at someone in the morning and quietly, the duty was passed on. An extremely frustrated Romeo had nodded at Laxus in the morning and for those who had not lost hope yet, this was a duty they could not refuse.

Hearing the footsteps, Laxus rose from the bed and headed over to the door, opening it just in time to see Wendy's braid disappear. "Oi, Wendy," he said. "Already back?"

The sky sorceress reappeared and smiled thinly, hazel eyes red from tears she had shed. "Uh, yes," she said. "Did you spend the night at the apartment?"

He nodded as he mentioned at the door behind him. "I just considered making coffee – you could have a cup. You look like you need it to be honest," he said with a wry smile. Along with Gray, Wendy had taken Cana's disappearance the hardest – with himself not far behind. The three of them shared the sentiment like going to the guildhall was rather pointless without Cana there to tell jokes and laugh like there was no tomorrow.

When he had woken up this very morning, for a second, it had felt like something was different and he could not help but wonder whether he had seriously thought that maybe, maybe, she would bee in the kitchen, cursing under her breath and making breakfast. He wondered whether this was the final proof needed that he had finally snapped after the sudden disappearance of his girlfriend/friend whatever or whether this was normal.

"It's not easy for you to be here, right?" Wendy asked as she slumped down in a chair.

"No," he admitted. "But not as hard as it is for you," he added. "I just wonder … why didn't she say anything to anyone? Gray … he would have kept her secret – if he was not the one looking for her whenever he is not on a job, I would really guess that he knows more than he lets on. She could have told me – first saying that I was a friend and then leaving be in the cold - typical."

"She never said you were special or anything?" Wendy asked, hazel eyes wide and full of wonder. If he would not know better, he would have guessed that she knew more than she said but this was impossible. Wendy was the only one worse at gambling than him because her poker face sucked – or at least that was what Romeo had once yelled through the guild.

"Never," he said with a shrug. "And before you can follow Gajeel's example and accuse me of kidnapping her and hiding her somewhere – though I guess he was rather drunk at that time – no, I did not and if it would help finding her, I would burn this world to the ground."

"She really never said anything about where she would go if she was hiding from the guild?"

"Twelve years and she never said anything like that – I never pegged her to be the type to hide either," he said thoughtfully. "But I guess that no matter what is going on, it will end soon. The last thing I heard was that Erza got Jellal and Meredy to look for her everywhere … and if Crime Sorciere looks for someone, they always find them."

"But you _have_ to have an idea, Laxus-san," Wendy muttered under her breath.

"I never won a game of hide and seek against her when we were kids - actually, Lisanna and Natsu are the only ones who ever did because of their enhanced senses. I seriously don't think that she would let me start winning now."

"You do care, don't you?" the blue-haired girl asked quietly.

"I am worried," he said slowly. "That's … that's not Cana. To run, I mean. She solves her problems and doesn't try to outrun them. She may be a trickster but she is no coward. If she is running then something really, really bad happened … something she cannot control or something." He frowned deeply. "Seriously, if I could turn back time and help her somehow, I would."

"I can't remember that you and Cana ever hung out together though."

"Because we didn't, to be honest. We did a few requests together, spend a little time in inns and sometimes, she invited me over. We were once accused by a surprisingly rather drunken Gray of being friends with benefits … but that wasn't it. We were friends, first and foremost because we could relate to each other."

Suddenly, Wendy's lower lip started to quiver before she started crying again. She had not cried much since the day her sister figure had left but whenever she had, it had been connected to Cana somehow – probably because Fairy Tail was not like it used to be since she was gone.

"Don't cry, okay?" Laxus said hastily. "I … I will go and help Juvia look for her, alright?"

"I … I just was thinking … usually, if someone leaves without a goodbye, it's because he doesn't have someone to say goodbye to … but Cana, she … she had us. She could have said goodbye to you, Laxus-san, or to me," Wendy sobbed. "I wonder … whether she felt like she couldn't trust us or something like that. I mean, it's not like the friendship was gone, right? It's still there."

Laxus had not cried at all but right now, he felt like joining Wendy.

He had been the first to notice that Cana was gone even though Gray had first announced it. He had known that something was amiss when the corner in the guildhall had been empty and then, he had hurried to her apartment to check whether she was there, without success. For Cana, things might have been over the moment she had stepped out of Magnolia but this had been when it had started for everyone else. Laxus remembered how he had been forced to deal with angry men, frustrated women and crying mages of both genders. He remembered how Evergreen and Erza had sat next to each other, old rivalry forgotten and forgiven. He remembered how Natsu had awkwardly tried to comfort Gray while Lyon Vastia of Lamia Scale who had been there to visit for some reason had stood there in silence.

* * *

Wendy felt rather guilty as she walked through town after leaving Laxus to himself. Playing dumb to gather more information was something she had never done before but after all, she was rather pleased with the outcome. She had now gained enough information to be sure that there was hope to get Cana home one day soon – and this was necessary because everything seemed to grey and empty without the usual spirit.

"Wendy-chan – you okay?"

She looked up to see Romeo who had obviously returned from a short mission as he was carrying his backpack. "Romeo-kun," she greeted as she approached him. "How was your mission?"

He shrugged as they started walking next to each other. "Short … a welcome break from the … you know, the business with Cana-nee," he said as he frowned. "She was my babysitter, years back, when dad was out on jobs. So yeah, I really wonder what made her leave."

This only served to make Wendy feel even worse. Having to lie to her best friends was starting to become another burden on her shoulders, another weight she had to carry – but this time, she had no longer the nerve to lie. The knowledge she carried would rip her apart otherwise.

"Romeo-kun," she said. "I … I found Cana."

The young mage stopped and turned to the side. "I knew it would be you," he said, maybe a little disappointed and frustrated because he had been searching for Cana as well. "How … how is she … and did she say why … why she went away?"

"She seemed to be fine but … I cannot tell anyone why she left," Wendy said. "I made a promise."


	4. Chapter 4

**_4_****_th_****_ Chapter_**

* * *

**_She is the sunlight  
and the sun is gone_**

_Trading Yesterday_

* * *

Cana hated herself for doing this to her guild, to her family. And because she hated herself, she had punished herself. The bar she owned, the Fortune's Fontaine, was mostly frequented by other mages, by people who might recognise her one day but most likely would not because her cover and the story she had come up with made it rather unlikely that she was indeed Fairy Tail's most famous missing mage.

But her punishment was more than just living at the sidelines of a life that had once been hers and watch how others did what had been her job too, only three years ago. The more crucial part of her punishment was the fact that she knew just too well that everything had been her fault – her fault for falling in love, her fault for paying no heed to warning her mother's fate had been, her fault for letting it all get out of control. For the guild, Cana might be the sun – especially now that she was gone – but for Cana, the guild was the most important part of her life and without it, her life was rather empty. Her sun had been Laxus – even though she hated to admit this. Loving Laxus had been the unhealthiest decision of her life because this had been the root of her rotten luck. And yet, she did not regret. She loved Cornelia and without Laxus, she would not have her daughter (though she would be still with the guild).

Loving Laxus had never been easy because it was very much like loving a thunderstorm – always dangerous, always a little bit too fast-paced. But no matter how much it had hurt her, it had been worth it. No pain no gain, they said and at least sometimes, they were right with their saying.

But she could not let this drag her down now, she remembered as she carefully applied her lipstick and the rest of her complicate makeup. Cornelia sat on the ground, looking up at her with wide and slightly confused eyes. Her daughter was a child who needed the light far more than Cana needed it herself. Usually, she did leave the town as long as she could avoid it but after the encounter with Wendy, the little town she had been hiding in had become too small for her to breathe properly. So she put on her war paint, picked up her daughter and headed for the train station because after all, there were still many places she could go to.

Lilietta was always worth the journey and as she walked familiar streets, it slowly became easier to smile like nothing was amiss. Cornelia on her shoulders was giggling and pulling on her hair like she was some sort of horse which was currently the favourite animal the two-year-old had and all in all, it was like it was a completely normal trip for a mother and her child.

She stopped for a moment to buy ice cream for both Cornelia and herself before she bought a few new cards for herself and an ancient crystal orb for the decoration of her bar. Lilietta had many interesting stores and as she had been busy with her bar lately, she had not gotten around to shop properly in weeks. Also, while her new hometown felt rather cold and lonely because of the absence of what had made Magnolia her home, Lilietta seemed to be full of sunlight.

The past three years had felt like winter – but not like the nice winter when the guild got together for snow ball fights and everyone – even Gildarts and Laxus were there to laugh (Gildarts more, Laxus less) with the guild. It did not feel like standing too close to Gray when he decided to cast his ice make magic. No, the three years had felt like snow falling right onto her soul and even the rays of sunlight she felt whenever she saw Cornelia's smiles seemed to be strangely weak compared to the feeling of utter defeat. But Cana was no stranger to this kind of winter. She had weathered it once before right after her mother had died. But this time, it had felt like she had been the one who had died.

"Mommy!" Cornelia squealed as she clapped her hands. "Mommy – shiny!"

She turned her head before she spotted a shiny bracelet at one of the vendor's stands. "You are too smart for the bracelet, Conny," she said as she looked up to her daughter. "You can have such a bracelet when you are older … a good deal older."

"No, mommy, _shiny_," the girl said, the forehead furrowed in frustration as she pointed at a sight that nearly made Cana's heart miss a beat or two. At another stand, Juvia Lockser who wore a sleeveless blue dress and had a shiny silver hairclip keeping her hair in line was going through a collection of books, brows knitted together because she seemed rather focused.

Cana had not expected Juvia to appear in Lilietta – even less than she had expected Wendy to start a fight right in front of her bar. To see her old friend was a foreign feeling and for the second time in two days, Cana felt how she drowned in guilt once more. Wendy had told her about the rainstorm Juvia had accidentally unleashed over Magnolia as a reaction to Cana's departure – a rainstorm that had turned into a full-blown snowstorm as Gray had lost control over his magic as well. Juvia looked rather well but Cana had known her for too long to believe the lie her appearance told. Juvia was not fine and she had not been fine in a long time.

"J-Juvia…" she whispered as her eyes closed because watching her only made more memories resurface. "Dear Mavis, no. That … that is … that is not okay."

"Mommy?" Cornelia asked, still feeling rather confused at her mother's strange behaviour.

"Sorry, sunshine, mommy is confused too," Cana said before she averted her gaze and turned her head away – just in time because Juvia had picked up on the feeling of being watched and had looked around. "Mommy is a little tired, too. Let's find somewhere to sit down."

* * *

Juvia felt watched as she kept looking for the book which had been her original purpose for the visit in Lilietta. Levy's birthday was coming up and a few well-aimed questions at Gajeel later, the water mage had known what kind of book would interest the solid script mage the most. Even though in retrospective, it might have been a better idea to ask Freed instead of Gajeel when it came to books because the green-haired man surely knew more and might not have talked about the 'stupid book' from that 'moronic author' even though the use of the word moronic had surprised Juvia a little because it had not been in Gajeel's vocabulary before he had started to hang out and later on to date Levy.

The water mage sighed deeply as she stepped away from the stand as it did not have the book she wanted to buy for her friend's birthday. She slung her bag over her shoulder as she crossed the place to get to where Laxus was munching an apple while he leaned against a wall. "Laxus-san, the book is not here," she said as she let out a frustrated sigh. "It seems like Juvia came here for nothing at all … she … I apologise."

"No, here has to be something," he replied as he frowned, scanning the crowd once more. "I don't know what but somehow, I feel like something or maybe even _someone_ is hiding here."

"Someone … you don't mean Cana, do you?" the blue-haired woman bit her lower lip as she also went back to searching the crowd for the familiar brown hair. "By the way, where did this sudden enthusiasm come from, Laxus-san? The last thing you said was that looking for her without any basic idea of where she might be would be a waste of time…"

He smirked as he shrugged. "You know, I may be a terrible gambler but I am not half as bad as Wendy," he said. "I have to admit that she did trick me for a moment … but she looked a little bit too guilty. So I guess that she has a basic idea of where to find Cana."

"Wendy-chan may be bad at gambling but Ju- I never saw Cana losing a game though," Juvia said as she followed the lightening mage through the crowd. "And I wonder why you are trying to bring her back … wouldn't she be just another rival for the position as guild master one day?"

"My reasons don't differ much from yours," he said. "And Cana … I once told her that I would always bring her back home … she also tried to run away after her first failed S-class exam."

"Laxus-san wants to bring Cana back to impress Gray-sama?" Juvia asked as her eyes narrowed. She would never have guessed that the lightening mage might be just another love rival but as it seemed, he had merely hidden his ill intend a little better than most people.

"To be honest, no I have no intention of sweeping Fullbuster of his feet so don't worry, he's still just yours," he assured her. "And to get back to the topic at hand, when I first asked her to stay, she didn't want to listen so I threw her over my shoulder and carried her back to the guild. She didn't speak with me for a while but all in all, it turned out just fine."

"Because you love Cana."

"Not that she ever gave me a chance to prove it but yes, indeed," he said with a hint of bitterness sneaking into his voice. "Everything connected to Fantasia destroyed so much … and until she went away, I had neither the words nor the actions to mend things with her properly, to show her how sorry I was about doing this to her in special … because she had known me the longest and so I guess that outside the Thundergod Tribe, no one knows me as good as she does."

"So Laxus-san misses her a lot, right?" Juvia asked, face straight and serious, as they kept looking for the book and the woman. "He maybe even wonders what he did to deserve such a fate."

"Being an inconsiderate jerk would justify any punishment," he said. "It's just hard to believe that she would do something like this to the guild. She has never been the type to hold dramatic speeches on _How Friendships Strengthens the Magic_ but … she took great pride in being a fairy."

"Cana was the first to truly make Ju- me feel welcome," the woman said, remembering Fantasia. "And while Cana may think that I owe her nothing because I had electrocuted myself with the lightening lacrima beforehand, I still have to repay her for this kindness. It's not over just because she went away. Juvia remembers and Juvia always settles all her scores – the good and the bad ones. Juvia owes no one anything – neither a favour nor revenge."

"I do owe her a favour," he said with a sigh. "A big one, actually, because she didn't mention a certain event to the entire guild and that basically saved me from Natsu's stupid jokes. She kept her word and so, I owe her to keep mine as well. So I need a chance to make things alright."

"I don't have any jobs until after Levy-chan's birthday," Juvia said with a sincere smile. "So I have the time to support Laxus-san's attempts to find Cana."

If Juvia were honest with herself, she also did not want to return without Cana because this would mean to admit another failure and the bitter taste of that was too familiar to her lately.

Laxus stopped, frowning and tilting his head. "I think she is close," he muttered under his breath.

"Can you still remember her scent – after all the years?"

"I also still remember the way she likes her coffee," he said. "The little things are sometimes the most important ones – and to forget a single detail might mean instant death on a job."

"I know. I am S-class as well," she said, remembering how empty the victory had been in the end.

"Yes," he nodded. "I … I have been an S-class mage for so long and have focused on making not a single mistake for so many years … and yet, the worst of it would have avoided to tell her … and to let her go without a fight, that I didn't go after her the moment I realised it."

* * *

Laxus followed Juvia as she dove into an alleyway where she suspected another bookstore but his mind was focused on the familiar scent he had picked up. If the area had less people, tracking the scent would be a good deal easier because there would be less distraction for the second generation dragon slayer but as he knew the scent just too well, it was far easier to keep track of it than it would have been if it had been a completely foreign smell.

The streets of Lilietta were rather busy as it was usual for the town and he had lost count of how many times someone had crashed into him during his search for the woman who had not only broken his heart but had thrown it into a aquarium of sharks – while it had still bleed. But he wanted answers and to get them, pain was a small price to pay.

After all, she had always caught him off-guard and now matter how things would develop, she would probably do it again anytime. She had – as he had preached over and over for three years now – never been a saint but a trickster, someone willed to break the rules if necessary but while he had known this better than anyone, she had also loved this side of her because it had been always as unpredictable as a thunderstorm.

He exhaled as he looked at Juvia who had finally succeeded in buying the book after she had driven any owner of a bookshop they had visited up the wall in the past three hours after they had left Magnolia. "If you were hiding from the guild," he started as he narrowly avoided an elderly woman who was hitting a thief who had attempted to steal her purse with her crane while rune knights approached the scene, "where would you try to hide?"

The woman was silent for a moment while her brows furrowed in concentration. She had been asked this question before when they had first attempted to find Cana but back then, her guess had been far off. "I would try to hide openly," she muttered. "And I would try to do something I like so that hiding is not that much of a pain. I guess I would start running a pool or something … something nearly too obvious for me to run, something no one would even check because it would be too easy … we all tend to complicate and overthink things."

"What's a pool to you would be a bar for Cana…" he muttered. "But – someone probably did consider that option and checked the bars … I mean, this would have the most obvious guess."

"I cannot speak for everyone but I can say that at least Gray-sa, Gray," she once more corrected herself as a bitter expression crossed her face. "Gray did consider it as too painful to enter bars for the first year after Cana's disappearance. And I guess that the pain was the same for everyone … so I don't think that anyone would have entered a bar to search her."

He nodded, feeling with her for a moment. Everyone had thought that Juvia would have taken the chance to pursue Gray after he had become sadder and far more emphatic than he used to be after Cana had left – which was just another scar she had caused – but instead of doing this, the water mage had even turned him once down – probably because she had felt like it was not the right time for a relationship or because she had known that it was mostly the loneliness speaking out of the ice make mage. "Freed might have," he replied, smiling thinly because the green-haired mage had been acting rather stoically about the entire thing while everyone else had freaked out and in a way, Laxus had not yet forgiven this.

"Freed-san carries his burden as well, he is only more silent about it than everyone else," Juvia said quietly. "I even think that he rather suffers in silence than to burden someone else."

* * *

Out of all the people she had left behind, she had always thought that Juvia would be the one she would be able to see somewhere the easiest because with the exception of Wendy, the water mage had been her friend for the shortest time and had had the least time to burn herself into the card mage's mind. But just like everyone else, Juvia had somehow become part of the memories of the days that should never have ended, to the days when everything had been easy and when the idea of having to leave them all behind had been nothing but a bad, bad joke.

Seeing her now was like opening an old diary to remember what had been, it was like remembering the old stories, the things they laughed about, the things they had all found ridiculous. It would have been – if she had ever needed and if seeing Wendy had not made it obvious enough already – the final proof that leaving Fairy Tail was impossible.

Some details of the past might hurt because it had been just too petty but all in all, it was fact that she could no longer stroll into the guildhall like nothing had ever happened anymore that hurt the most because this was – as she had stated before – part of her punishment.

She sometimes listened to the music on her old songpod – one of the few presents she had gotten along the years she had taken with her – when she went through the old pictures and somehow, the combination of old songs and slightly faded photographs got her every time again. It was every time the same song that made her shed a tear because it made her feel like time stood still, like she could walk through the streets and back to Fairy Tail and opening the door, it would be just like she had left it behind.

She shook her head, trying to get rid of those thoughts. "Snap out of it, Alberona," she said, closing her eyes for a moment. "Seriously, you are a grown woman – now act your age."

Cornelia on her back announced the presence of Juvia in a alleyway to Cana's left – for some reason, the toddler had taken an immense liking to the water mage's silver shirt – but as the card mage checked for a way to avoid a confrontation, she froze – because behind Juvia stood Laxus who seemed to be looking for something or someone.

_'Calm down!'_ she ordered strictly as she concentrated on breathing slowly and properly. _'He does not know that you are here. He probably lost someone, maybe Gray because there's Juvia. Yes, the three of them are here to buy a birthday present for Levy … that's soon after all.'_

She patted Cornelia's leg before she picked up a pretty ribbon that would go nicely with her daughter's pink her. They had not come to Lilietta with a special goal in mind so she could afford to spend some money on cute but rather pointless things – things she would have liked to down as a child but never had the money to buy them.

Soon enough, the sun started to settle again and she – after checking whether she had finally gotten rid of Juvia and Laxus who had been a little too close behind her for the past few hours – entered a quiet and cosy inn with the intention of having a meal and finding a room to stay in. She had not to worry about her bar after all. She had hired a manager who took charge of everything whenever she did not make it when members of Fairy Tail or other former friends happened to be in town.

She gazed around, smiling fondly at her daughter, as she felt once more a rush of memories carrying her away but when she tried to remember it completely, it only slipped away. For a moment, she considered ordering something stronger than water to drink before she remembered that she had to be responsible now because she had to care for Cornelia.

Ironically, Cornelia was her sole blessing in her current valley of despair. If she had not gotten pregnant, she might have easily become one of the most famous mages of her guild – if she had not already been it. People would have written books about her. Now, they would not do this.

But she loved her daughter and would never blame her for the way her existence as Card Mage had ceased to exist. The only thing she hated was the way people always seemed to pity her when they found out that she had once been a mage of a guild – yes, the life of mages was floating when if you failed one too many jobs, it was over for you.

But this did not mean that Cana regretted anything about this.

Fairy Tail was still her home and one day, she would return to the guild. She would face the disappointment of her peers one day – when she felt strong enough to protect Cornelia from the pain and everything else. She knew that the delay tactic she ran at the moment would only serve her for so long – that it would all end once she would be found by someone she could not ask to stay silent based on an old debt.

"Huh, love really is blind, huh?" she muttered as she ruffled her daughter's hair.

"Miss, can I get you anything to drink?" the waiter asked.

If she had been a few years younger and more foolish, she would have asked for the strongest drink of the house but so, she only nodded. "A bottle of water for me and a cup of milk with money for my daughter," she replied before she smiled guiltily at her daughter. "Mommy is sorry for being so distracted lately, sunshine," she whispered. "I promise that things will get better again … I just have so much on my mind right now, I am sorry."

Cornelia only smiled as she reached out to take her mother's hand. She was too young to understand what was troubling her mother but she sensed that her mother was worried.

"I love you, Conny, you will always be my number one," Cana whispered. "I will fix things, make them all alright for you. I promise. There will be no ugly spots left soon, really. Don't worry about me. I may be alone but how could I be lonely with you around? I have you after all, my top priority. I won't mess around with any glorious plans about returning home … because your safety is what matters most. I love you … because there is nothing I have left to prove when it comes to you … and this is why … why I can still breathe freely with your around."

* * *

"Is Laxus-san sure?" Juvia asked, a little moodily and frowning. She was not bothered by the rain but the growling thunder in the distance made her rather uncomfortable so she rather appreciated the idea of turning in early.

"The trace ends here," he replied, looking up to the sign of the inn in front of them.

"Just … don't be disappointed if we don't find her here, when it is a false track," she said hesitantly, remembering the dejected expression on Gajeel's face when a track had ended somewhere in the depth of the forest. "Seeing other people sad … makes me sad as well."

He only nodded. "She is here," he said, not only because he could smell her. Now, he also recognised a certain presence that was so Cana that it felt like she stood right next to him.

Juvia shrugged as she followed him into the inn. Inside, it was warm and cosy, so comfortable that she nearly forgot the objective of their mission. But after experiencing Laxus' wrath a few times along the past years, she knew that it would be smarter to stay focused even though she rather liked the idea of having a warm meal and maybe a warm bath later on.

Laxus, on the other hand, cursed under his breath as he realised that the inn was rather crowded and that it was nearly impossible to find someone in the room. He sighed deeply before he nudged Juvia. "Let's find table and sit down," he muttered. He knew that Juvia was most likely not exactly happy with the current circumstances and usually, he might have forgotten about this but before they had left, Mira had reminded him of being considerate for once.

The blue-haired woman nodded as she carefully pushed a man out of the way – only to reveal a rather interesting scene because on the other side of the inn, a man had approached a young woman who – after a heated exchange of insults – simply got up before she softly said something. Then, after the man still did not leave, she simply grabbed his wrist and sent him to the ground before she picked up and soothed her child.

"Excellent stance and execution of that move," Laxus remarked before his head stopped because as the woman moved and put her daughter onto her shoulders before she made her way over to the bar to get keys or the bill, her shirt rose and revealed a guild stamp, the black Fairy Tail insignia and as everyone knew, there was only one person who had worn it on her stomach.

And that was the missing Cana Alberona.


	5. Chapter 5

**_5_****_th_****_ Chapter_**

* * *

**_And you cannot fight the tears that ain't coming  
or the moment of truth in your lies  
when everything seems like the movies  
yeah you bleed just to know you're alive_**

_Goo-Goo Dolls_

* * *

Midnight was a time when Wendy Marvell rarely expected visitors. And yet, there was someone knocking at her door though it sounded like someone was trying to break it down. Charle, ever the diva, slept through it like it was just another peaceful night. The apartment building was secured, it was in one of the best areas of the town after all and this left the young mage with no other choice than to get up and open up the door.

To her surprise, her visitors turned out to be Freed who seemed to be mad about something, Bixslow who seemed rather confused and slightly annoyed and Romeo.

"W-why are you here?" she asked, rubbing her eyes.

"I told them nothing!" Romeo instantly defended himself as he raised his hands. "They turned up at my place as well, scared the hell out of dad and dragged me along!"

Freed sighed. "We will apologise to Macao-san – or at least, I will," he corrected as he looked at his partner-in-crime. "Anyway, Wendy-chan, could we please come in for a moment? It came to our attention that you … are also informed about … what happened with Cana-san."

"Don't be surprised that we know something Ever and Laxus don't," Bixslow said amused. "It's not our fault that our way of investigations was a good deal better than whatever the others did. My, our dearest trickster is good but she ain't that good."

"We merely considered any options about why she might leave and after talking to the nurses in different hospitals, we figured out the truth," the rune mage nodded. "However, after she went through all of this to keep it a secret, we decided to keep her secret."

"For Laxus' sake, though," Romeo muttered darkly. "Because all you guys ever do is for his sake."

"I don't see how making out with-"

_"Bixslow,"_ Freed hissed. "Anyway, you are not exactly right, Romeo-kun. The Thundergod Tribe is supposed to support Laxus, yes, but our interpretations of this task vary greatly at times. In this case, we decided that he had so much on his plate that not telling him would be a favour."

"Though it made the rest of the guild suffer?" the young fire mage snapped, feeling rather annoyed with the both men. "You … you have … you have no idea. You have no idea what it felt like for dad, Wakaba and Gray-nii! They all missed her a lot, you know?"

"We know and we did feel guilty, kiddo," Bixslow said, his face growing rather serious. "But this was not about every single mage who missed her. This was about Cana, too, and at least this time, we chose someone but Laxus as our top priority. That sounds like a lame excuse, we know, but seriously, it's not our place to be everyone's babysitter, seriously."

"So, uh, why are you here this late at night?" Wendy asked, taking a step backwards.

"We are here because … Laxus and Juvia-san left for Lilietta earlier today, right?" Freed sighed as he followed Wendy into her apartment. "And, well, through … reliable sources, we heard that this is the city where Cana likes to go shopping … especially after an encounter that made her a little uncomfortable – like the one she had with you, Wendy-chan."

"So, yeah, Cana will most likely run into Laxus pretty soon – if it didn't happen yet," Bixslow added with a shrug. "And because we all know Laxus, we cannot be sure how that will end."

For a moment, everyone was silent because indeed, they had all witnessed what Laxus could do when he was truly angry had someone – and even Cana would most likely not walk away from this kind of confrontation without having suffered at least a small injury. On the other hand, Cana was quite famous for her way to lash out as well and once she felt threatened, there was not saying in how she would react.

"If he accuses of her of having cheated on him," Romeo mused aloud, "the Thundergod Tribe will have to look for someone new to follow. She … she won't bat her eye at any insult he can throw at her … but if he does that, she will rip off his head with her bare hands if necessary."

Freed flinched, obvious not interested in this discussion. "We came to the same conclusion, yes," he said darkly. "Anyway, you have to see: we somehow need to stop this from happening. Yes, they have to talk about it … but I would prefer it for them to speak in rune cages that prevent them from using any sort of violence against each other."

"Even if we knew where exactly they are, there is no way that we could get there in time," Wendy said as she shook her head. "Also … what kind of reliable source did you mention there?"

"Let's just say that we have both ways to supervise someone or something rather closely – that's

how we know that she is not at home and that you were there not too long ago," the rune mage said as he toyed with the collar of his jacket. "But yes, we need to get to Lilietta."

"We will be too late," Romeo remarked.

"Too late to prevent the meeting maybe but we can still limit the damage a little." Freed shrugged as he frowned. "So, uh, Wendy-chan, you were the last one to see Cana. How was she … did she seem normal for her standards?"

"She was sober … more mature and responsible," the girl said as she pulled back her hair into a high ponytail. "If we are going to Lilietta, I need other clothes than my pyjama. Give me a few minutes to get ready … and you should think about the transport problem."

* * *

If Juvia had been asked to summarise the past three hours, she would only shake her head. Cana and Laxus had been pacing around in the room without saying a single word for hours now. But this was obviously the silence before the storm. Cana looked different from the way she had three years back. Her hair was now darker – obviously dyed – and hung over her left shoulder in a side braid. Her way of dressing had changed too because she now wore longer shirts.

For Juvia, the tension in the room was unbearable. She knew that this was some sort of contest who would break first and from the way their eyes were blazing with a strange mixture of fury and confusion, she wondered how long it would take until they would finally snap.

At the wall, Laxus was thinking the same. He could see the way Cana's fists were clenched by her sides because she was probably more than willed to beat the hell out of him. He had always known that the card mage had a rather fiery temper and thus, he should not be too surprised if she would snap before him. Then again, she had visibly matured along the years – something he could not say about every member of the guild if he was completely honest. But all in all, he was not sure whether he truly wanted to argue with her again. Usually, there was never any good in arguing because it would only make everyone sad.

The funny thing, however, was most likely the fact that he was not mad at her. Three years had made him more mature and he could understand why she made her decisions. Her behaviour had not been intended to hurt anyone but as a woman who had hurt for a long time, she had had to protect herself from hurting anymore. He could understand that. Neither she nor he had had a great father figure in their lives. Ivan had been a bastard and Gildarts had been always away. They had grown up without parents and while she had been good with kids, Wendy and the children at her old orphanage were the best proof, he had never been able to get things right.

"Nice self-defence move you used there earlier," he finally said awkwardly.

The tension eased considerably and he realised that he had said the right thing, that he had gotten her out of her frustrated and rather annoyed state. It was unfair that she was this angry. He had the right to be mad. She had brought terrible pain over the entire guild after all. But for some reason, he also knew that this was not about blame because that would be a little too pathetic.

She nodded slowly. "I worked on that," she said hesitantly before she sat down on the couch, still holding her daughter. "A woman has to take care of herself in this messed up world."

He raised his eyebrow, mentioning at the child. "What's her name?" he asked, feeling rather awkward. He had done the math and come to the conclusion that he had had a daughter for the past two years, a daughter he knew absolutely nothing about.

"Cornelia," she said gently rocking the girl back and forth. "How has everyone been?"

He shrugged. "Natsu and Lucy started dating about a year ago – while Juvia over there turned Gray down," he added with a mention into the direction of the silent water mage – only to notice that Juvia had silently left after they had started to talk. "She, uh, went through the strange who-am-I-really-stage … and ended up as a pretty decent kid … worked with Ever lately."

"She has always been a good woman," Cana agreed. "I, uh, heard that the master's … feeling rather … off lately. I hope he has been doing a little better…"

Laxus frowned. "He hasn't been really well since Fantasia, no, even before he had trouble," he said with a sigh. "Grandmother came back from the forest a year ago to stay with him permanently … we all know that his time is limited … but it scary … to know that he will die one day."

"I had really hoped that Porlyusica-san might have been able to help him somehow…"

"It's complicated – he isn't the youngest anymore and when he's stressed out, bad things happen. I am not saying that his latest attacks were your fault but … you surely didn't make it easier for him," he said slowly. "I mean, I got a pretty good idea of why you left and I am taking half the blame there, of course, but … I really don't see how he will get at least a little better without you there. I mean, Porlyusica told me that after Fantasia, you checked on him quite often."

"I felt responsible for that. I have been in the guild for so long … I couldn't leave him alone then."

"And I guess that he felt rather guilty for not being there when you needed support," Laxus said slowly, sitting down on the other side of the couch. "Look, I know that I screwed up. I am not sure why you thought that you had to run away when you realised that you were pregnant but … this is not the right moment for dealing with things of this sort."

"I simply panicked and my first instinct was to run as far away as humanly possible," she admitted. "I am sorry for doing this to the guild … and to you, of course."

He carefully reached out to pat her shoulder. "I am not mad at you, Cana, alright? A little disappointed about your lack of faith in me – well, but that's most likely my own fault too, huh?"

"I am still sorry," she said, lowering her head. "It's just … you are a lot like Gildarts in terms of unpredictability and I really didn't want to end up like my mother … always waiting for someone to return, never losing faith … yet slowly … fading…"

He had been aware of this fear of hers, the fear of sharing her mother's fate one day because before Gildarts' had entered her life, Cornelia Alberona had been an independent mage who had been very successful. No one had gone as far as to blame Gildarts for his wife's rather sad fate but Laxus had always known that some people had wondered about this. "I know," he said quietly. "That's why I am not mad at you for doing this to me."

"So, you missed me as well?" she asked bashfully as she lowered her gaze.

"At least as much as Gray and Wendy," he replied with a shrug. "Look, Cana, we are both terrible with words … and even worse with apologies. But, well, we grew up, didn't we? We outgrew the stage when I was an inconsiderate jerk and you a reckless drinker. I am not saying that old faults should be forgiven and forgotten because that's not how things work. It's just … don't add Cornelia to the list of young children who have to grow up without a family."

She had expected rage the very moment he would figure out things – and she had never been able to lie to him properly when she had been nervous. She had expected him to freak out and tell her that she could go to hell, maybe even that he would try to take Cornelia away from her – just to make her regret the decision to ever go away. But Laxus had changed. He had started to understand that some decisions were made without a rational base. He had learned to take her demons seriously – partly because her demons were his as well. He was no longer a man who was greedy for power and influence. He now got that some things were hard to express.

"I don't want her to be without a family either," she whispered. "But … can you forgive me?"

"I already did, Thunder," he said, using her old nickname again. "And since I can forgive you for walking out of my life without a word, the others will forgive you as well. You left not only to protect only yourself after all … you tried to keep harm away from everyone."

"You got pretty good at guessing other people's true intentions," she remarked as she leaned back. "I guess that you actually talked with other people lately, huh?"

He grimaced. "When gramps decided to let me take other the daily business at the guild, that master stuff, my dearest grandmother was worried that I might snap once more and stage some sort of Fantasia Part II. She basically made Freed my psychologist and had him writing reports as to control my set of mind," he sighed. "Freed let me sometimes get away without the annoying session when we just sat there and watched lacrima vision – there have been few good films lately, seriously – but the deal I had with him was to speak with other people."

"Don't tell me that you finally gained social skills!" she chuckled.

"You would be surprised. I actually manage to talk with Natsu without insulting him for more than two minutes now," he grinned. "And I somehow got convinced to apologise to a few people. Ever was totally sure that this would make gramps realise that the guild is safe with me – or maybe she just wanted to get a good laugh on my expenses."

"I wouldn't put that one past her," she admitted after a moment. "And … I missed you as well."

He smiled as he ruffled her hair. "You scared the hell out of us when you were suddenly gone."

* * *

"Flying on your babies was the craziest thing I did in my life," Romeo stated as he finally regained firm ground beneath his feet. "Anyway, what are we doing now? We are most likely too late to prevent the confrontation from happening anyway."

"I was wondering what caused this disturbance," the familiar voice of Juvia resounded in the darkness as the water mage stepped out of the shadows. "Please, do not look after them now."

"We have come to bring her home," Freed said as he grabbed the rapier at his side.

"I would really prefer if you would not say things like this," she replied. "I get it now – it is to protect not only Laxus-san but to save Makarov-san because you assume that this will help him to get better again. However, you cannot speak with them now. They are just talking now. They make progress. He will make her return to Fairy Tail. Just trust me on this one."

The rune mage gulped as he unsheathed his weapon. "I am sincerely sorry for this, Juvia-san, but two years ago, we – the Thundergod Tribe – were asked to retrieve Cana as soon as we would gain the information on where she is," he said slowly. "You see, while the Thundergod Tribe has sworn to protect Laxus, we are also an elite team of the guild and hence we were tasked with this rather difficult job."

"I won't let you get to them," the woman said quietly. "Even if this means to fight you, even if this means to get hurt a second time on Cana's behalf … I make my promises as well – and I have promised myself that I would find Cana … and leave the rest up to her."

"Juvia-san, Freed-san!" Wendy said as she took a step forward. "Y-you can't be serious about this! this is neither the time nor the place to fight each other. You can't force her to go this far to stay true to her own rules, Freed-san, and you can't be serious about fighting him, Juvia-san."

"I accept her rules," the green-haired mage said slowly. "But I have my own rules to obey."

"B-but this will only end in pain and unhappiness!" Romeo said as he grabbed Wendy's trembling hand. "Juvia-nee, you said that you are with Gray-nii in this … and he said that Fairy Tail needs Cana back as fast as possible."

"Juvia has seen Cana today," the water mage said, reverting back to her old pattern of speech once more. "And Juvia thinks that Cana will come home anyway … but she has to have the freedom to decide this … we are in no place to decide in Cana's place what she will do."

"I accept your stance, Juvia-san," Freed said. "Now I'd like for you to accept mine. Bixslow, you go ahead. Decisions can be made later on."

His teammate rolled his eyes – even though no one saw this because of his visor – and hurried away, dragging the both teenagers along. "Freed's crazy for taking her on alone," he muttered under his breath. "He knows that she has gotten stronger since Fantasia."

The _crazy_ man stood in the rain, carefully studying the woman in front of him. "You know, I kinda regret the way we cross blades and faith again," he said slowly. "The difference from the last time around is that this time, I am the one looking for Laxus and you the one who stands in my way and tries to keep me from getting to him. Ironic, don't you think so? And once more, I don't know whether I am the hero or the villain."

"Neither of us would make a good hero," she said calmly. "We are guided by personal beliefs and do not act rationally right now. Maybe, if things had gone a little different…"

"I don't like being your enemy again, Juvia-san," he admitted. "You are the kind of person no one likes to have as an opponent … you are too focused on protecting to care about anything else. This is surely admirable about you … but it is also the reason why this fight has to take place."

"I am not afraid of you or your magic. It will harm me, yes, but I won't care."

"The spirit of a truly noble warrior, thank you," he said as he bowed his head.

"Thank you for being unafraid or thank you of fighting you again so that you lose time and have an excuse in case that the entire operation fails?" she asked as she smoothly moved into a fighting stance. "I do acknowledge you as a superior tactician, Freed-san, but your heart is not in this fight … because if you are true to yourself, you will see that you don't want to hurt her either."

"Don't overestimate the guild I feel about Fantasia," he warned. "I am not above pushing you out of the way. This is no rematch I let you win just to pay for my previous sins."

"_Good_- because I wouldn't want for you to hand over victory on a silver platter," she said with a tiny smile. "You see, Freed-san, I have trained for an eventual rematch – or a general situation where magic won't help me. This time, I am prepared to take you on."

The fight begun and as he had guessed, she was smart enough to obey the rules he had set – which did not mean that she allowed them to restrain her power. It rained and there was a river nearby. For a water mage, there could hardly be a better area for a fight. She did not even have to take control of the rain that drenched their clothes because the humidity in the air was already more than enough to form a water slicer whenever he was about to write runes. She knew that she would lose her advantage in offensive power the very moment he would be able to create a strong rule and for this reason, she focused very much on preventing this from happening.

The fight was about to heat up a little more when they suddenly found themselves restrained by ice – but sadly, for Juvia, this meant complete inability to move for a short moment while Freed's arms were still mobile – and because he had originally expected her to dodge, he slashed her coat and her dress, leaving her fuming and embarrassed.

"What were you even thinking?" Erza Scarlet sheathed her sword as she strolled over to them, hazel eyes gleaming with fury and anger. "Fighting in the middle of a town! How could you?"

"Our opinions clashed as she did not want to let us pass," Freed explained. "However, as it is my fault that the situation escalated, I take full responsibility."

The redhead rolled her eyes as she turned her head. "Gray, give Juvia your coat – it's not like you seriously need it anyway," she ordered. "And then, we will all act like civilised people and meet up with the others in an inn. I have orders from the master – we are only supposed to bring Cana back if this is her wish … otherwise, she can stay where she has found her new home."

Gray stepped out of the shadows, letting the ice vanish and wrapped the coat around Juvia before he nodded. "Natsu and Lucy were supposed to stop Bixslow and the others," he said with a shrug. "Anyway, Freed, I thought that you were on babysitting duty today…"

"Mira cancelled her mission after Lisanna got the flu," the mage sighed. "And since Cyrus is save with Evergreen and Elfman, she sent me away so that she could take of her sister."

* * *

"…the master cancelled the mission retrieve her at any cost?" Romeo said visibly relieved as he scratched his neck. "Freed-san's statement seemed like the order was very old and serious…"

"It was … the master asked us to bring the lost fairy home," Lucy nodded. "But I think that he realised that he cannot demand for this to happen … because Cana's feelings matter too … and she had been hurt so many times that she deserves this … break if you ask me."

"Cana-nee is someone who loves the guild … and I think that if the right person asks for her to come home, she will return," the young fire mage said. "What do you think, Wendy-chan?"

"I guess that we're about to find out," she said as she turned her head. "Because they are coming in our direction … just like Erza-san with Gray-san … and the others are there as well."

"So there was no dramatic rematch between Freed and Juvia? Boring," Bixslow sighed.

"If Laxus got a kid, it has to be strong," Natsu mused. "Mira won't let me fight Cyrus but Cana might let me fight her kid – what do you think, Luce?"

"I think that you are an idiot for even considering the option of fighting a child!" Lucy snapped.

Erza pushed Freed onto the bench before she sat down as well, fingers forming a roof on the table. "Anyone who has a clue on what will happen now?" she asked tiredly.

"Out of all of us, I have known her the longest … and I have no idea on what she will do now … I guess it depends on how Laxus dealt with the entire business," Gray mused aloud. "Juvia mentioned something about a child … so that's true, I guess. Personally, I think since her own childhood was far from great, she will come home … if only to give her … daughter, yes?" He sent a questioning glance at Juvia who nodded. "…from living as lonely as she did."

Lucy carefully reached out to pat his shoulder. Gray has suffered greatly under Cana's disappearance because as he had just said, he had known her the longest and as she had been his oldest friend. Though Lucy herself had been a member of the guild for a relatively short time period, she had realised how close the stripper and the drunk had always been.

"It will be okay," Erza said calmly. "And we should relax a little – we are freaking out everyone else in the inn … I mean, sure, we have come in a little late and this has to worry the civilians."

"Or maybe they are just trying to figure out how to ask you for an autograph," Juvia said drily.

Even Wendy who had focused very hard on catching the sound of Cana's approaching footsteps cracked a little smile before she opened her eyes again after closing them to focus only on the sounds. "They are about to arrive," she said as her fingers drew nervous pattern onto the table.

And indeed, the door opened to reveal Cana who was smiling rather nervously while Laxus towered behind her, carrying a sleeping, pink-haired child in his arms. Gray's eyes widened as he rose and he quickly crossed the room before he came to a stop in front of his friend. His face was unreadable as he crossed his arms as stared straight at her. For a moment, the noisy crowd in the inn seemed to fade away until there was nothing left that might distract him.

"You," he said as he poked her and pushed her back a little. "The next time you randomly decide to disappear – with reason or not – you rather remember to leave a note. I am sick and tired of people I care about disappearing from my life … so I highly advise that you don't go and pull a Loke on me, understood, Alberona?"

"Without a doubt, yes," she nodded as she guiltily stared at the ground. "But where's your shirt?"

"Not funny," he growled at her but it was good to see her again even though he really wondered why she had ever been stupid enough to fall in love with Laxus – the guy spelled trouble after all. But even with this less then glorious decision and even though it was nearly a miracle, they were still friends and this meant that they would regain their old bond sooner or later.

"It wasn't a joke," she said as she picked it up and threw it at him. "Put it back on – you are causing public disturbance, you know?!"

He rolled his eyes but obeyed nonetheless. "Oi, Cana, is it too late to call godfather?"

On the bench, the previously silent Freed regained his ability to speak. "Obviously I am better suited for the position of the godfather of Laxus' daughter," he declared.

"S-class mages should get the first pick based on how long they have been S-class," Erza threw in with a dangerous gleam in her eyes. "And since Laxus is the father and Gildarts' the grandfather, that leaves me with the very first pick. And yes, I indeed claim the child as my godchild."

"You cannot make the rules like that!" Juvia protested. "It should be in the order we got to know that the child even existed!"

"Thanks for making me godfather, Juvia," Bixslow grinned. "I figured it out first after all – and that makes Wendy godmother … if she's up for that challenge."

"I call the rule that friends get special bonuses!" Gray replied harshly. "And well, if I count back, that basically makes me the godfather and Juvia the godmother. Case closed."

Lucy sympathetically shrugged before she smiled at Cana. "Welcome back," she said. "I guess you didn't miss their arguments, did you?"

* * *

Makarov Dreyar was taking a morning walk under the strict supervision of his wife and medical adviser, Porlyusica, when he heard loud discussions from the street and given the fact that it was eight in the morning and most people were still sleeping, this was rather strange. But no matter what, there were people arguing and as they got closer, he could understand them.

"…I still say that's Wendy and me who deserves the honour!"

"Tsha, no, because you at least have no special attachment to Cana at all! Juvia and me have proven to be her friends for the longest time – and we didn't go out to bring her back against her will! Juvia and I deserve to be godparents, no one else!"

"The one who has been S-class the longest, I am telling you! That's the only way to go!"

"So that would also include Mystogan … you seriously want to go to Edolas and drag him back, Erza-san? No, only someone who has followed Laxus for the longest time deserves this honour."

"Would you fucking shut up already?!"

"Laxus! No cursing in front of Cornelia-chan!"

"…would you **please** shut up already?"

"This arguing is leading nowhere if you ask me."

"Yeah, Luce and I should be godparents – what do godparents do anyway?"

"I've had enough of your childish arguments! Freed and Gray, neither of you will be godparents, okay? Gray, you are like a brother to me, you are a _real_ uncle. And since Freed has been Laxus' friend for the longest time, he is a real uncle too. I don't want to hear another claim until we are there and I get to consider this all alone."

"So, if Freed and Gray are out … does that mean that Wendy and I won?"

"…was it really necessary to curse him into silence, Cana?"

And then, finally, the crew became visible and for the first time in three years, Makarov's heart opened up because his lost daughter, the lost fairy had been brought home in one piece. Cana was healthy – a little red in the face because of the anger she most likely felt at the arguing mages – but she was also glowing with happiness. With the aid of his staff, he took up hurrying towards the group – much to Porlyusica's dismay but then again, many things displeased her – and when he reached her, he hugged her tightly. Usually, he was no one for dramatic reunion scenes – but after losing someone who had been a ray of sun for the entire guild for three far too long years, he could not help himself.

"I have come home," she whispered.

* * *

"…all of Fairy Tail is a family and so Ca- **we** decided to give everyone the same chance at becoming a godparent," Laxus said rather unenthusiastically as he leaned against the counter, watching Gildarts crying over Cana's return and his grandchild. "Everyone is going to draw a stick … there are two pots – the women all take from one and the men from the other. Got it?"

"What's if we actually have no interest in becoming a godparent?" Mira asked as she patted her own son's back. "I am just asking … for my part, I am already godmother of three children … and though I really adore Cornelia-chan, I feel like I should give up my possible claim."

"In that case, you don't take a stick," Cana said as she turned away from her father for a moment. "They are magical … there won't be a missing number or anything like that."

On the other side of the guildhall, Gajeel decided that this was a good moment to disappear but Levy and Pantherlily both grabbed him and pushed him to the pot were he – after the more enthusiastic members – drew a stick. (Before him, Jet had nearly thrown the pot to the ground. Even though he had been made godfather five times before – once for Levy's and Gajeel's daughter along with Juvia and Droy and the other times for his sisters' children.)

"A six?" Freed declared disappointed. "Does that mean that I won't be godfather?"

Cana smiled at him encouragingly. "_Real_ uncle," she mouthed which instantly cheered him up.

"Eight," Erza said as she threw the stick away, frustration visible in her face,

"And that's – my friends – is a one," Evergreen said as she spun the stick around. "I am Cornelia-chan's godmother now, right? That means that I get to buy playthings and all that stuff, yes?"

Though she would not have been Cana's favourite choice, the card mage relaxed. Eccentric as the self-proclaimed true queens of fairies was, she had proven herself to be a rather good mother – even capable to handing her own twins, Lisanna's son Bo and Freed's son Cyrus at once.

"Could have been worse," Laxus muttered as he watched the way Erza glared murderously.

"But who got the second one?" Gildarts asked as he looked around.

This was the moment Pantherlily started to giggle and after a moment, Levy joined in – both of them were staring at the stick with the gleaming one in Gajeel's hand.

* * *

**THE END**

* * *

**AN**: _I actually think Gajeel would make a rather good godfather … he would most likely not be the __**careful oh-my-god-something-could-happen**__ kind of godparent but the cool one who takes the child climbing once it is a little older and tells the best stories. (As long as he does not sing, Cornelia will have the best godfather in the Fairy Tail universe.) Also, imagine Evergreen and Gajeel arguing about every little detail regarding Cornelia's birthday parties while Cana and Laxus simply stare in awe. Also, it was implied that he and Levy have a daughter of their own. He will be fine._


End file.
